I’m working with a homeowner on a major remodeling project who initially told me she was afraid to hire any contractor because she didn’t want to be disrespected.

Her admission stunned me for a minute because I would think that any contractor who met with a potential client and hoped for her business would be on his or her best behavior during that interview.

But she told me that she had worked with remodelers in the past—and so had her friends—who were downright patronizing, rude and dishonest with her. I asked her why, and she said she is sure it’s because she’s a woman.

Her perception of male contractors is that they don’t believe women know anything when it comes to remodeling—even when it’s at their own homes. Her experience involved dealing with all kinds of subcontractors whom the general contractor sent to her house without introducing her. Also he ignored her complaints. They left their lunch wrappers and cigarette butts all over her property at the end of every work day.

All of that, she told me, felt like disrespect. She wants her house fixed up, but it would be easier to live with an avocado-green kitchen for the rest of her life than endure months of disrespect by workers whom she was paying and to whom she had been nothing but pleasant and cooperative.